Smug
by SSBFreak
Summary: A songfic about everyone's favourite psychopath, Yamazaki. (I had SUCH a great time writing this :D)


Smug  
  
As the song starts off with a musical beginning, the shot shows a shot of Southtown, and starts focusing on the 'Howard Tower', the office building of Geese Howard. The camera goes into the top floor of the tower, and keeps on going until it reaches the elevator, where it stops. As Steve Taylor's voice starts singing, the elevator doors open, revealing the tall figure inside.  
  
{Strike a little pose. Chin up in the air.}  
  
{Lips together tightly. Nostrils in a flare.}  
  
Yamazaki steps out of the elevator and starts walking down the hallway. Soon, he arrives at the door to Geese's office.  
  
{Now look like you care. Oooo, very nice!}  
  
The Yakuza pushes open the doors to the office and walks inside. We see Geese sitting at his desk. As the singing pauses for a few seconds, Yamazaki walks over to Geese.  
  
{Practice in the mirror. Brushing back a tear.}  
  
{Very sincere.}  
  
Yamazaki throws some papers on Geese's desk, and Geese picks them up.  
  
{A promising career could begin right here at home.}  
  
{If you've got that smug.}  
  
Geese reaches under his desk and pulls out a wad of money. Geese hands it to Yamazaki, who starts counting it.  
  
{That smug.}  
  
A close up of Yamazaki's face. Yamazaki cracks a sly grin.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama lookie what your little babies all have become.}  
  
The instant the chorus starts up, the camera switches scenes. The shot is in front the Pao Pao Café, where Terry, Andy, Mary and Mai are eating. As the chorus starts, we see Yamazaki appear on the left side of the screen, working his way to the right. He's doing what looks like a one-legged sidestep (watch the 'Smug' video to see what it looks like), scooting across the sidewalk, in front of the café. The four fighters notice him.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama don't it ever make you wish you'd been a nun?}  
  
A closer shot of Yamazaki, still doing the one-legged sidestep. He jumps on a lamppost and spins around it once before jumping back onto the sidewalk and continuing his sidestep.  
  
{Vain and fickle, were we weaned on a pickle? Is it in our blood?}  
  
A shot of the four fighters in the café. They all look at each other for a few seconds, then react. Terry and Mai shrug, Andy shakes his head in hopelessness and Mary spins her index finger around her ear.  
  
{Rome is burning. We're here turning smug.}  
  
As the chorus finishes, we see Yamazaki sidestepping down the sidewalk, over a hill before disappearing.  
  
As the song continues with a musical interlude, the shot changes to the streets of Hong Kong. We see a figure in a coat walking down the sidewalk, and on closer inspection, we see that it's Yamazaki.  
  
{Strike another pose. Power politics.}  
  
{Swallow their conventions. Get your power fix.}  
  
As the camera closes in on Yamazaki, he turns around, and groans, because the next shot shows that Hon Fu is standing there, obviously to arrest him.  
  
{We LOVE to mud wrestle. We LOVE being politically Koreshed.}  
  
Yamazaki throws off his coat and shoves one hand in his pocket before charging at Hon Fu.  
  
{Practice that smug. Pose it like a man.}  
  
{One part Master Limbaugh. Two parts Madame Streisand.}  
  
Hon Fu attempts to strike Yamazaki, but his zany opponent is too quick. As he gets close, Yamazaki thrusts his fist into the air, sending Hon Fu flying thirty feet up. Hon Fu comes down hard.  
  
{Now pretend you're in a band. My, MY we're looking smug.}  
  
Yamazaki charges up a Snake Arm as Hon Fu tries to get up. Yamazaki lashes out the attack, sending Hon Fu down. The cop tries to get up, but he's so dazed, that he collapses.  
  
{Very, very, very, very.}  
  
A close up of Yamazaki's face. He stands there, silent. Suddenly, he starts bobbing his head every time Steve Taylor sings 'Very' with a psychotic grin on his face.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama lookie what your little babies all have become.}  
  
The scene instantly switches to a Chinese temple, where the Psycho Soldiers Team is training. Yamazaki appears on the right side of the screen, doing the one-legged sidestep across the screen to reach the left side.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama don't it ever make you wish you'd been a nun?}  
  
Shot of the Psycho Soldiers Team, all of which has stopped his or her training to watch Yamazaki. Bao suddenly runs away from the team and catches up with Yamazaki. As soon as he does, Bao starts doing the one- legged sidestep behind Yamazaki, copying him, while Yamazaki doesn't notice.  
  
{Vain and fickle, were we weaned on a pickle? Is it in our blood?}  
  
Yamazaki suddenly looks back and sees Bao copying him. Yamazaki stops and turns around, infuriated. Bao stops too and looks up at Yamazaki with a cheesy grin, but that doesn't stop Yamazaki from pulling his foot back and punting the boy off the screen.  
  
{Rome is burning. We're here turning smug.}  
  
The rest of the Psycho Soldiers Team watch as Bao flies on screen and lands off-screen, on the ground between Kensou and Chin. The rest of the team look at each other, shrug and continue training.  
  
As the song goes through another musical interlude, the scene switches yet again. This time, it's on the streets of Korea. On closer inspection, we see our 'hero' walking down the streets.  
  
{All you smug-starved millions in the thick of the search. Welcome to our church.}  
  
{Whatcha wanna solve? We can help you evolve from merely self-righteous.}  
  
As Yamazaki walks down the streets of Korea with both hands in his pockets, a punk thug jumps in front of him, and another behind him. Yamazaki quickly finds himself surrounded by five punks.  
  
{To perfectly smug.}  
  
Despite the situation, Yamazaki grins.  
  
{Strike the proud pose of our country club brethren. Friendly as a tomb.}  
  
{Fragrant as the bottom of a locker-room broom.}  
  
Yamazaki suddenly whips out his fists and grabs the two thugs at his sides by the necks, lifting them off the ground. Yamazaki throws them away and charges at another punk. Yamazaki performs 'The Drill' on the poor sap, knocking him out.  
  
{Now what's the matter? Hey...Get off your knees! That part don't come 'til later! God will not be pleased...}  
  
Yamazaki glances at the two remaining punks, who stare back at Yamazaki for a few seconds before running away screaming like little girls. Yamazaki sticks his tongue out, taunting the punks.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama lookie what your little babies all have become.}  
  
The screen instantly changes scenes again. This time, it switches to Kim's dojo. Kim is at the back of the screen, training countless students, whom take up most of the screen. Suddenly, Yamazaki appears at the back of the screen, on the left side, doing the one-legged sidestep behind Kim.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama don't it ever make you wish you'd been a nun?}  
  
Closer shot of Yamazaki and Kim. Kim looks back at Yamazaki as he scoots behind Kim and disappears off the right side of the screen. Kim looks forward as the screen pans back to show the students. Every last student Kim was training is now doing the one-legged sidestep in place. Naturally, Kim freaks out.  
  
{Vain and fickle, were we weaned on a pickle, is it in our blood?}  
  
A shot of Chang, Choi, Jhun, May Lee and Kim's two sons, all of whom are standing off to the side. Chang, May Lee, Kim's sons and Jhun all sweatdrop, but Choi is bobbing his head with a Yamazaki-like grin.  
  
{Rome is burning. We're here turning smug.}  
  
Shot of Yamazaki hopping towards the screen. Yamazaki throws his fist at the screen, breaking it into hundreds of pieces.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama lookie what your little babies all have become.}  
  
As the pieces of the screen from the previous scene fall off the new screen, the chorus starts again. On the new scene, Yamazaki is seen dragging Hon Fu on the ground after performing the Guillotine. The ring the two are in is made up of every other Fatal Fury character to appear in the series, even Tsugumi Sendo and Alfred.  
  
{Hey mama hey mama don't it ever make you wish you'd been a nun?}  
  
After finishing the drag, Yamazaki thrusts his foot into Hon Fu's stomach rapidly. Terry covers Mary's eyes as the Jin twins cringe.  
  
{Vain and fickle, were we weaned on a pickle. Is it in our blood?}  
  
As Hon Fu attempts to get up, Yamazaki does an uppercut, sending Hon Fu into the air before falling back to the ground. Cheng sweatdrops as Tung Fu shakes his head.  
  
{Rome is burning. We're here turning...}  
  
Hon Fu manages to stand up, but quickly falls back down.  
  
{Rome is cooking. My, we're looking smug.}  
  
Seeing his opponent defeated, Yamazaki grins. He turns around, his back facing the screen.  
  
As the song gets ready to end with some more music, Yamazaki walks towards the edge of the ring of fighters, his back still facing the screen. Duck King and Li Xiangfei step aside to let Yamazaki through. As the song gets closer to finishing, Hon Fu shakily gets to his feet and starts chasing after Yamazaki, but the gangster sees the cop coming and spins around, punching Hon fu with such great impact, that the cop is now soaring towards the camera screen. As soon as the last note of the song is played, Hon Fu's head hits the screen, breaking it.  
  
END  
  
Author's note: Man! I can't believe how much fun I had writing this! Well, if you're a little confused about the 'one-legged sidestep', watch Steve Taylor's music video for 'Smug'. However, good luck finding it. The song is ten years old. Anyway, please red and review. 


End file.
